https://supernuclear.substack.com/p/stoop-coffee-how-a-simple-idea-transformed
Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Patty Smith. Patty and her husband enjoy the kind of neighborhood so many of us would like - connected, helpful, fun - but it wasn’t that way two years ago. A simple tradition changed their neighborhood and is a good reminder of how small, consistent actions can have outsize results. It also shows you don’t have to share a kitchen or a roof to live in community.
18 months ago, I wasn’t planning on spending more time hanging out with my neighbors than with friends I’d known for decades. It started with a simple goal: my husband Tyler and I wanted that sense of community that feels like it’s only possible in the suburbs, but we believed we could achieve this while living in San Francisco. We brainstormed: should we make cookies and knock on doors? Should we invite neighbors over for dinner? Ultimately, we landed on sipping coffee on our “stoop”.
Tyler (left) and Patty (me! right) on one of our first stoop coffees
Hanging out on a stoop is not a novel concept. Unfortunately, an increasing trend of isolation has resulted in fewer and fewer neighbors gathering to connect with one another. Stooping has provided benefits to so many communities. Why not bring this concept to my own neighborhood?
Tyler and I were already having leisurely weekend morning coffees in our house, so it was an easy pivot to sit outside with our coffees and enjoy the sunshine. And thus our tradition began. Every weekend, we would bring our folding chairs out onto the street – we had to make do since our house doesn’t have a stoop – and enjoy our caffeine. As we saw people entering or exiting their homes, we'd enthusiastically wave them down, introduce ourselves, and write down their names in our shared spreadsheet. I wore a goofy tie-dyed Six Flags hat so people would remember us as “those people” and we started calling this our brand awareness campaign (but of course, we live in SF).
We met Luke a month or two after we’d been “stooping” on a regular basis. He came by to introduce himself and asked to exchange numbers so we could let him know if we’d be out there in the future, he’d love to join. At the time we didn’t realize how important this moment was for us. We’d been meeting many neighbors in passing but Luke was the first person to offer to sit with us and he wanted to know how to coordinate. In retrospect we should have been trying to get peoples’ numbers all along but hey, we were new to this!
A typical weekend stoop hang
As soon as Luke started coming to stoop we actually started to resemble a group. It was validating to see a few neighbors getting together and this quickly attracted more! We learned to bring extra folding chairs for people who wanted to drop in for “just a minute” (or ninety) and Luke started bringing homebrew coffee to share. After a while, we realized it was starting to become unwieldy texting everyone when we were going to be outside. Thus, the WhatsApp group was born. At first this was just a place to announce when we’d be out having stoop coffee, but we soon realized people wanted to connect over more things than just coffee. So we ended up converting the group into a WhatsApp Community where we could have chats dedicated to certain topics or groups and plan other types of events together. Things were starting to get fun!
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The first larger event that our “stoopers” wanted to host together was a block party that soon got scoped down to a pancake party. We made a spreadsheet, assigned tasks, and acquired obscene amounts of pancake mix. We decided to host the party on the sidewalk in front of our neighbor’s garage to keep things easy and so we didn’t have to apply for permits. Gathering tables, chairs and an electric griddle was quick work with so many neighbors invested in making the party a success. The most important thing we did in preparation for this party was to print out 100 door drops to deliver to the nearest set of neighbors and post party fliers up on telephone poles. It was old school but it worked! Most of the new faces we saw were people who found out about the event through our paper invitations.
The Pancake Party in full swing
The event was a resounding success. 70+ people came by, and we added over 50 new numbers to our WhatsApp Community. From that point forward, each stoop coffee started seeing at least 10-15 faces and new people were volunteering to host. A few neighbor gatherings later – including an epic “Dipsgiving” sidewalk potluck where everyone brought a dip to share – the momentum has continued and we now have multiple events every week. During the span of a recent week in December, we had a neighborhood trash pickup, a cookie swap, a TV show watch party, a parent hang at a neighborhood brewery, and—of course—a stoop coffee.